What’s a more fun gift than something to keep your fun safe? Discreet enough to keep on your nightstand or dresser, large enough to hold your favorite dildo or mini-vibe or anything in between.

Materials

• 1 skein Artful Yarns Candy Sweet Tart
• 1 skein Lion Brand Yarn Fun Fur Violet (optional)
• 1 set US size 8 double-pointed knitting needles

Sizing

Gauge: 20 sts + 32 rows = 4″ on size 8 needles
Dimensions: 4″ x 10″ without fun fur

Directions

CO 42 st, divide evenly across 3 DPN (14 sts on each).

Rnd 1: P
Rnd 2: K
Rnd 3: P
Rnd 4: K
Rnd 5: K
Rnd 6: [K5 YO K2Tog] to end
Knit next 70 rounds.

Begin decrease

Rnd 1: [K4 SSK K2 K2Tog K4] to end
Rnd 2: [K3 SSK K2 K2Tog K3] to end
Rnd 3: [K2 SSK K2 K2Tog K2] to end
Rnd 4: [K1 SSK K2 K2Tog K1] to end
Rnd 5: [SSK K2 K2Tog] to end
Rnd 6: K2Tog to end

Finishing

Pull yarn through remaining stitches. Turn inside-out and weave in ends. Turn right-side-out and thread a ribbon through the YOs.

To add fun fur, pick up all stitches on the cast-on edge. K 1 round, BO and weave in ends.

It’s too hot to worry about getting sweat dripping into your eyes during rock shows. So… no sweat!

Materials

1 ball Cascade Fixation 2706
1 ball Cascade Fixation 3794
set of 4 US size 5 DPN (or 40″ circ for magic loop)
Note: I used about half the blue, and way less of the red. I’m sorry I didn’t figure out exact yardage.

Gauge

Approximately 5 sts + 10 rows = 1″ relaxed (unstretched) on US size 5 needles

I had a bit of a time with gauge on this project, because I’d never worked with yarn so stretchy before, all that elastic in the Fixation. I’m a tight knitter, so keeping the yarn slack and relaxed was quite a chore.

If you knit this pattern, find your gauge and use this pattern as a guide. Work with the guage that works for you, remembering to not tighten up your yarn.

Sizes

Stretchy enough to fit one medium sized head—mine is 21″ around.

Directions

Cast on very loosely 75 stitches and join in round.

Knit all arounds in the following color pattern:
Rnd 1-12: Color A
Rnd 13-14: Color B
Rnd 15: Color A
Rnd 16-17: Color B
Rnd 18-23: Color A
Rnd 24-25: Color B
Rnd 26: Color A
Rnd 27-28: Color B
Rnd 29-40: Color A

Finishing

BO all stitches very loosely; I followed Wendy’s variation on a Russian bind off. Weave in ends. Leave a very long tail, about 6-8 times the length of the band, to use to seam the piece. Your piece should look something like this:

Now fold the cast-on and bind-off ends together, and seam together:

Adjust the folds on the band so the seam is in the middle of the inside, and the stripes at the top and bottom of the front/outside:

Wear proudly and worry-free!

I made this scarf in my brother’s high school colors. Go team!

Materials

2 skeins Color A: Red Heart Super Saver Economy Gold (321)
1 skein Color B: Red Heart Super Saver Economy Black (312)
1 skein Color C: Red Heart Super Saver Economy White (311)
1 16-inch circular US size 8 knitting needle

Sizing

Gauge: 5 sts + 6 rows = 1″ on size 8 needles
Dimensions: 8″ x 84″ without fringe

Patterns for Each Block

Pattern for Block 1

Rnds 1-36: Knit all rows with Color A.

Pattern for Block 2

Rnds 1-3: Knit all rows with Color B.
Rnds 4-9: Knit all rows with Color C.
Rnds 10-12: Knit all rows with Color B.

Pattern for Block 3

Rnds 1-3: Knit all rows with Color B.
Rnds 4-9: Knit all rows with Color C.
Rnds 10-12: Knit all rows with Color B.
Rnds 13-18: Knit all rows with Color C.
Rnds 19-21: Knit all rows with Color B.

Directions

With Color A, cast on 80 stitches.

Follow the rounds for each block in this order:
Block 1, [Block 2, Block 1, Block 3, Block 1] x4, Block 2, Block 1

(Note: To make the scarf longer than the length listed here, repeat the section between [ ].)

Finishing

BO all stitches. Turn inside-out and weave in ends. Turn right-side-out, wash, and block.

To add tassels to the edges of the scarf, follow this article at eHow for a great explanation of creating fringe for tassels. Make enough fringe for 9 tassels on each edge of the scarf, 5 in Color B and 4 in Color C.

At the bind-off edge, attach one Color B tassel to the middle of the scarf, through both layers of knitting. Then attach two more Color B tassels on each end. Using the middle and ends as a guide, eyeball the locations of the remaining tassels.

Repeat this on the cast-on edge. Wear!

I had some extra Swish left over from another project, and I thought: hey! What could I made with this? Something fast and simple, but also very useful. Coffee cozy time! This is a very simple pattern, and easy to customize with your favorite stripes or colorwork.

Materials

KnitPicks Swish Lemongrass Heather
set of 4 US size 6 DPN (or 40″ circ for magic loop)

Gauge

6 sts + 9 rows = 1″ on US size 6 needles

Stitch Notes

K1P1: [Knit 1, Purl 1], repeat for ribbing
K2tog: Knit 2 stitches together, as one
SSK: Slip 2 stitches as if to knit, return them to the left needle, and knit those 2 st together through the back loops

Sizes

Stretchy enough to fit one to-go coffee/tea cup

Directions

Cast on 46 stitches and join in round.
Knit 4 rounds in K1P1 rib.
Knit 2 rounds.

Round 1: Knit to last 3, K2tog, Knit 1
Round 2: Knit 1, SSK, Knit to end
Round 3: Knit
Round 4: Knit

Repeat the above 4 rounds 4 more times.
(There should now be 36 stitches on the needles.)
Knit 1 more round.
Knit 4 rounds in K1P1 rib.

Finishing

BO all stitches and weave in ends. Enjoy your coffee!

Argh!

In the past two weeks, our site has been hacked twice. It’s quite a blow to the ego, let me tell you, but it had definitely made me realize that my awesome front-end web developer skills are of no use to me on the back-end (snicker) server part.

To combat this issue, we’ve moved our site from a self-hosted blog on my own server to a WordPress.com hosted blog. Unfortunately, our database was hit along with the site, leaving our backup rather fucked. I’m piecing together our old posts and articles from a collection of Google Docs, emails, and web archives. In the next couple weeks, you should be able to at least access the patterns we’d posted.

While we don’t often record new podcasts or vidcasts, we’ll keep them accessible on the blog, you know, for history. Or to remind ourselves that when we get together with a camera or a mini-recorder, we actually do have a lot of fun.

tl;dr: Stay tuned for old and new content!

Photo credit “500 – Internal Server Error” from girliemac